London - Jolly Old?

What to say about London? It's big. And old. And weird in a lot of ways. I am by no means an expert, as I was only there a couple of days. First impressions... It's a city, dirty, with no characteristic skyline. Since it was winter, the trees and parks were brown and dead, the people were hurrying, cold, brusque. The rooflines were a strange amalgam of old victorian peaks, project-shingled apartment buildings, and occasionally a romanesque church arch poking up.

It wasn't as busy as San Francisco or New York, but it wasn't quiet. I opted to walk from Paddington Station down to the Houses of Parliament (Big Ben) and then around Piccadilly Circus and back to Paddington. That was stupid. It was 0 (32 F) degrees out that day. I also bizarrely bought the girls' souvenirs on Queensway, on the way OUT of Paddington toward Buckingham (my first stop). So there was another 5-10 pounds on my back.

First thing out of the train station, I got lost. I mean, I went the wrong way for at least 20 minutes, adding 2 miles to the journey, but, more importantly, subtracting about an hour from my day! I went into a newsstand and bought Pocket London map. Then I turned around (yes, exactly 180 degrees) and walked toward Hyde Park, along the Queensway. As I mentioned, I picked up a few pounds of crap.

On the north side of Hyde Park, along the West end of Bayswater, there are artists (painters and sketchers) who line their works along the fence to the park. Nice stuff, lots of London/Thames scenes, Big Ben impressions, other famous sights from the city. It's worth a look if you have an hour or two (I did, it took me 45 minutes to walk along it).

I cut through Hyde Park, watching the English run around (the ONLY place I've seen English people run!) the jogging trails until I came to the statue in the center of the West side of the park, a horseman. I failed to note the gold off to the south until I followed the rider's gaze. Plodding and freezing my way southward, the vision of the golden man became larger and larger. Angels raised their faces from above his head. Lions and lambs, frozen in stone, lay about his feet! Who was this golden demigod, preserved forever in the heart of Kensington? Prince Albert. Big freaking whoop. I expected, I dunno, King Henry VIII or something, Victoria, Elizabeth.... Anyhoo, make a left and go along Kensington road.

Eventually, Hyde Park ends and there is this enormous Arch with Angels and guns and a park full of soldier statues and names on monoliths. "Duke of Wellington Plaza". Wow, Dukey must have been really really good at killing people. So I walked through the arch (there was a dude selling ice cream inside, hiding from the SUBZERO TEMPERATURES!). On the other side, the path picked up in a straight line toward Buckingham Palace. I almost tripped over a inlaid stone saying that this is part of Diana's memorial path. Yeah, Constitution Hill (the path) is also pocked with little statuettes in memoriam of the efficacy (or not-so-much) of the English War Machine. Green Park is a war park! It runs from the Duke of Windsor's bloody Arch to Buckingham Palace! Why place Diana's path through a war park? Sigh. Maybe it's just me. I'd have put her memorial path along the embankment I went by later. Maybe it does run there too, I may not have seen the foot stones.

So I got to the Palace. Palace. Not Castle. This day, I learned the difference. Um, a box. Like the White House. Oh well, at least the gates were entertaining: Canada (the one I came in at), S. Africa, Malay States, the jewels in the crown so to speak. And the main palace gates were grand. As were the Lion and Unicorn statues. But the center of the roundabout in front of Buckingham was all Victoria. Wow! What a great likeness and work that centerpiece is! She isn't quite beatific and she isn't quite stern. Amazing. I absolutely saw her regality and pain and sacrifice in that likeness. I actually liked the English a little bit. ( ;-) ).

After taking a few photos, I exited Buckingham by the Mall (S. Africa). Looking at the map, if I had time, I should have taken a detour down Buckingham Palace Road (Malay States)! But... I pressed myself, and my legs were warmed up from the first 3.5 or 4 miles.

So going east from Buckingham, you can go via the Mall, the road, or along the water. I kind of popped up and down the embankment, trying to get some photos from the obverse on the palace and trying to get some good across-the-water shots of Big Ben and Westminster Abbey. I then saw the 'London Eye' in the distance, this enormous ferris wheel thing built on the Thames, each of the carriages clear, that is supposed to give an unrivaled view of the city. Guess what? It wasn't on the list. But it was impressive, and it peeps out of the skyline in unexpected places. So I walked past the Churchill museum (no Winston statue), and the new government offices, and finally arrived at Westminster Abbey (about a mile from Buckingham, I went a bit the long way). Incredible cathedral, detail, silhouette, just amazing! I lingered there for a while and bought a coffee and just stared at it. Say what you want about religions, they do inspire some awesome architecture and beautiful silhouettes. Moving on, reluctantly, I went to the Big Ben face. I learned that the Houses of Parliament and Big Ben date from 1858 or so and was strangely surprised and disappointed. Not as impressive as I would have liked. Not as magnificent as 'Peter Pan' led me to believe.

OK! Freezing and thawing my way north past the mounted 'beefeaters' (I know the mounties aren't, but I don't know how else to describe them) who made me laugh, and about 30 or 40 war plaques and death monuments, which made me somber, I came to Trafalgar. People were picknicking at the fountain, kids were playing peek a boo, old people sitting on the steps to the monument. It was nice. Kind of like a small Rockefeller Center to my eye. Another coffee, more hiking. Up to Chinatown and Leicester. Think San Francisco Chinatown. Now remove 90% of the stuff and 99.75 % of the people. That's London's Chinatown and Leicester district. It looked interesting and there were some good and bad smells coming from different restaurants (both are usually worth investigating), but I was holding out for a 'good' meal. Ha! If only I could go back in time... Oh yeah, speaking of food, there was a micro-Italy next to this district too! Italian restaurants, trattorie, and cafes for about 2 blocks. Except (and I have a picture of this) every fourth one was a 'Bella Italia' chain franchisee. Um? I saw literally TEN Bella Italia's in this small district. As I said, I got 2 in a single photo shot. The other outlets were Prezzo (another chain, a little better than Bella), Cafe Nerro, and Costa. I guess the point is, if you're going to have chains, then why have a district at all?

In the square itself, there was a mini amusement park set up, kids were hooting, and parents were fussing and scolding for Johnny to put his hat back on, or Sarah to keep her mittens tied to her sleeves. Very fun and family area.

Next to Leicester and Chinatown is the theater district. I'm not an expert on theater. I saw four big ones in London. One had Les Meez, one had something I hadn't heard of, one was the Prince Charles Theatre which was hilarious, and the fourth one also had something I hadn't heard of.

Now I began to circle back westward a bit, toward Piccadilly Circus. Not too far from Leicester. All the pictures I'd seen of Piccadilly featured a) a double-decker bus, b) an odd statue, or c) a neon sign. Yup, that's about all there is in Piccadilly. Traffic, a single statue, and a single neon sign that says TDK and Coca-Cola on it, reminiscent of Times Square, but, um, just the one sign. Kind of stands out gauchely, no? Oh, there was a bunch of 'shopping' in Piccadilly too, but you can read about that in previous blogs.

One extremely cool thing I did notice is that Westminster Abbey, Trafalgar, and Piccadilly all line up in a perfect straight line along which I took a picture at Piccadilly (the highest point). Walking back along Piccadilly Boulevard (or Avenue or whatever) west, I passed more shopping and the Ritz (which was kind of different). Um, getting kind of hungry! Don't rich shoppers eat?

Apparently, rich shoppers do not eat. So I tried to go to the Hard Rock Cafe back in Knightsbridge after I got there. I was sniffed at by a snooty maitre d' who obviously did not approve of someone wanting to sit alone, and he asked if I wanted to eat in the bar. The Hard Rock is similar to our Hard Rocks and Applebees and all those things in that the bar seating tables are 'open'. Well, they were all full, and I was pretty hungry, and I don't like snooty English people. So I left and continued west, through the dark, back to Hyde Park, North, through Hyde Park, to the Speaker's Corner.

The topic of the moment was how Prime Minister Brown and the Parliament have caused jobs to be lost and also how the economy failing is all the fault of fascist agendas wanting the government and industry to become one, and... I hung out for about 15 minutes and then, um, left. West, North, West, back to Paddington. I ate across the street from the train station, at the 'Pride of Paddington' pub, after about 15 miles of walking or so. A very interesting South African (Peter) and I discussed the state of employment in the UK and the US. His H1B had expired in the US, and he had been seeking employment in the UK for the past few months, to no avail. I listened to his story of hardship, employment search, and surprisingly, his suffering from Piracy in the Carribean! The story went that he saved a bundle of cash working in the US and wanted to retire or lay low in Nassau for a few months. He was robbed by Caribbean Pirates! (I asked about cutlasses and dead men's chests, and the like. Nope, none of those involved). So he did have someplace to go - he was going to chill out island-style until the employment situation picked up a bit, maybe try Canada as well, or Scotland. I wished him good luck, and providentially my food arrived.

I ended up with fish, chips, and a Guinness. Maybe two. It was a long long day.

Album: Facebook "London - Ye Olde Parte One"

Album: Facebook "London - Ye Olde Parte Twoe"

Album: Facebook "London - Ye Olde Parte Three"

Map: Google "London 1"

[GJF: Written 22 January 2009]